More on the Holiday Catharsis theme…
She made him his favorite cake and had Half and Half on hand for his coffee. She would wait to turn on the pot lest his two o’clock arrival turn into three o’clock.
She remembered their last visit together and how he seemed to blame his shortcomings on others without taking responsibility for his decisions. That hurt her. She wanted to tell him that he had made the decisions that shaped his life, but that may have provoked him. Instead, she contorted herself into a beacon of consolation. She saw so little of him; she wanted their visits to be pleasant for both of them.
Again, today, like a Gumby doll, she stretched and morphed to prepare for the optimum visit. Why does she do it when she knows he is merely showing up? (Caring for someone isn’t always fun and isn’t always fair.) Like Gumby, her cheerful expression remains glued to her face. Just a few stretches to stand up taller and a few more to reach her arms wider.
Life keeps ticking away. She has less and less time to live like a real human. But she flattens her soul and props herself up so she doesn’t fall. She has flattened all three-dimensional thoughts. She is ready and the doorbell rings.
TATTOO—Journeys on My Mind
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Buy it. Read it. Let me know what you think. —TMLL